In an event that is becoming all too frequent but never any easier to understand, our nation again mourns the innocent lives taken at the hands of a madman who decided to make a statement with senseless violence. Once again, public places are feared, gun control is a hot button issue and mental illness is looked to as a possible scapegoat.Not much is known about James Holmes, the 24-year-old who opened fire on a sold out movie theater at the midnight showing of The Dark Knight Rises in Aurora, Colorado, last Friday. He killed 12 and wounded 58 more during the rampage that seems without motive. Although it has yet to be confirmed by a trained medical professional, it is being speculated that the current most-hated-man-in-America must be suffering from some form of mental illness or be experiencing a psychotic break. It doesn't take a medical degree to realize someone must be very sick to resort to such violence on innocent strangers. No one in their right mind performs such a heinous act never exhibiting one iota of remorse.
Just like Harvey Dent's Two Face character in the Batman comics, mental illness has two faces - one is polished and poised, the other is ugly, scary and makes others squirm to look at. While one suffers in silence, the other makes headlines. I have suffered from mental illness for over half of my 29 years. At thirteen years old, a deep depression took hold over me and has never let go. Relief has come in the form of medication, talk therapy and the never-ending love and support of my family and friends. As bad as things would be (and at times they were very bad), I never looked the part. I took showers, I dressed nicely, and I didn't feel comfortable telling others about my inner turmoil. People never guessed the truth, and they are still shocked now when I admit to my personal suffering. Mental illness doesn't always look as ugly and painful as it is; it can look 'normal'.
Throughout all my years of pain and darkness, I have never once wanted to harm another person. Those violent acts baffle me as much as the next person, but the need to be heard, that desire for people to take notice is completely relate-able. What causes a person to go from a functional member of society to bringing unthinkable chaos to hundreds of lives? We cannot begin to understand his reasonings. His anguish must have been extensive, and his hunger to be heard great. Those of us that are suffering may not show it (we don't all dye our hair red, call ourselves The Joker and wreak havoc on a crowded auditorium), but we long to have a voice that isn't ignored or overlooked. Instead of defending our right to bear arms during this emotional time in our country's history, we should resolve to practice more of our First Amendment rights. Simple conversation has the power to change lives.
Talk. Listen. Prevent.
